Got any jokes? Good, bad, I don't care. I'm just wanting to start a long points whoring session and build up a library of bad jokes. I'll start with one I heard today, Two old lady's are standing outside a nursing home smoking, when it begins to rain. Nonchalantly, one old lady pulls out a condom, pokes a hole in one end, and puts it over the cigarette, continuing to smoke. The other old lady looks at her and says, "what on earth is that for?" First old lady replies, "I got it at the ph...

Got any jokes? Good, bad, I don't care. I'm just wanting to start a long points whoring session and build up a library of bad jokes. I'll start with one I heard today, Two old lady's are standing outside a nursing home smoking, when it begins to rain. Nonchalantly, one old lady pulls out a condom, pokes a hole in one end, and puts it over the cigarette, continuing to smoke. The other old lady looks at her and says, "what on earth is that for?" First old lady replies, "I got it at the ph...

Okay boys and girls, little Joey found the marble in the oatmeal, you know what that means? That's right! He gets to drink from the firehouse!!!!!! Yeah.......yeah, that's how exited I get when I get to put up the christmas lights. Only this year, it's been three years. One in an apartment. One in Korea. And the last one before that, I was in Monterey. So I dug out the old light ball and went to work. (and I didn't even fall off the roof once. well, sort of once, but that didn't real...

Okay boys and girls, little Joey found the marble in the oatmeal, you know what that means? That's right! He gets to drink from the firehouse!!!!!! Yeah.......yeah, that's how exited I get when I get to put up the christmas lights. Only this year, it's been three years. One in an apartment. One in Korea. And the last one before that, I was in Monterey. So I dug out the old light ball and went to work. (and I didn't even fall off the roof once. well, sort of once, but that didn't real...

Ever notice that one of the quickest ways to get a compliment is to tear yourself down? It seems like people who would ordinarily never piss on you if you were on fire will tell you nice things if you publicly shred yourself. And the converse is true as well, say something nice, however true, and they're sure to pick at you for being egotistical and vain. It seems that we as people can't handle those who are out of dead center mediocratic ego. Try to do something, and you will hear a mi...

Ever notice that one of the quickest ways to get a compliment is to tear yourself down? It seems like people who would ordinarily never piss on you if you were on fire will tell you nice things if you publicly shred yourself. And the converse is true as well, say something nice, however true, and they're sure to pick at you for being egotistical and vain. It seems that we as people can't handle those who are out of dead center mediocratic ego. Try to do something, and you will hear a mi...

I saw Geezer's latest article the other day, and it reminded me of the multiple wierd pictures that I have located hither and yon on the net. Here's some of my favorites, most I've posted before. If ya like, show me some of yours. As promised, something you should never do to a cat....... How I think of chip's sofa............. The wahine grinch/hulk, just don't make her mad......you wouldn't like her when she's mad............. Squirrel fishing..........heh heh.....

I saw Geezer's latest article the other day, and it reminded me of the multiple wierd pictures that I have located hither and yon on the net. Here's some of my favorites, most I've posted before. If ya like, show me some of yours. As promised, something you should never do to a cat....... How I think of chip's sofa............. The wahine grinch/hulk, just don't make her mad......you wouldn't like her when she's mad............. Squirrel fishing..........heh heh.....

Bring it on!!!! What do you like to get shrill about? Where's the flame, baby? What is it that gets you all het up inside and blogging page long comments composed entirely of bold font capital letters? Is it politics?................abortion? homosexuals? the war? oh yeah, you know you wanna blog about the war......yeah, yeah........ Bush? Kerry? Dare I say it...........rednecks? Liberals? Maybe religion is your hot button. Sex? Now there's a topic for ranting on, sex. sex sex sex sex...

Bring it on!!!! What do you like to get shrill about? Where's the flame, baby? What is it that gets you all het up inside and blogging page long comments composed entirely of bold font capital letters? Is it politics?................abortion? homosexuals? the war? oh yeah, you know you wanna blog about the war......yeah, yeah........ Bush? Kerry? Dare I say it...........rednecks? Liberals? Maybe religion is your hot button. Sex? Now there's a topic for ranting on, sex. sex sex sex sex...

Have you joined the military? Are you tired? Bored? Deployed? Burnt out? Spent too much time away from your wife? Well have we got a deal for you! It's called the federal holiday! That's right friend, each and every federal holiday, we're going to give you off! But wait, there's more, you don't just get the holiday off, you get the weekend days surrounding it off as well! (this limited offer does not include tax, title, or license, most people who are deployed, busy, on an active mission, ...

Have you joined the military? Are you tired? Bored? Deployed? Burnt out? Spent too much time away from your wife? Well have we got a deal for you! It's called the federal holiday! That's right friend, each and every federal holiday, we're going to give you off! But wait, there's more, you don't just get the holiday off, you get the weekend days surrounding it off as well! (this limited offer does not include tax, title, or license, most people who are deployed, busy, on an active mission, ...

Ha Ha!!!! I survived another year, so tommorow, I'm 28. (It's also gonna be greywar's birthday, so be sure to flood his blog with birthday greetings, email him, call him, send flowers to his house, show up at his front door with cake and beer, become the Psychotic Birthday Stalker, etc........or not.......) May go to Dallas (or the junkyard to scrounge around for parts for my Mustang) tommorow, so I'm birthday blogging today. And of course, here's part of my yearly self inventory inclu...

Ha Ha!!!! I survived another year, so tommorow, I'm 28. (It's also gonna be greywar's birthday, so be sure to flood his blog with birthday greetings, email him, call him, send flowers to his house, show up at his front door with cake and beer, become the Psychotic Birthday Stalker, etc........or not.......) May go to Dallas (or the junkyard to scrounge around for parts for my Mustang) tommorow, so I'm birthday blogging today. And of course, here's part of my yearly self inventory inclu...

In my finest tradition.........how do you get a french horn section to sound like a chainsaw?.......play the chainsaw out of tune....... Allright, now you're warmed up for the pain......... I was on the phone a couple of days ago with my mom, and somehow the subject turns to ancestry. I'd always known about the Irish, the Cherokee, and suspected a few surprises that my racist grandmother didn't tell us, but how about this? Apparently, our family was largely Scottish! In all practica...