Hello, my name is ben, and I have a problem..........I'm a cook. (no, not for the army, I'm a linguist, silly........or a silly linguist.......) I got started eight years back, after my wife and I got hitched, and were slowly losing weight on a regular diet of mac and cheese, and the occasional burnt pork steaks. After a little while of this, my sister got me Cooking for Dummies as a gag. Muhahaha!!!! I shall take this seriously, thunk I, and the joke was on her! Eight years later, I'm p...

MUHAHAHAHA!!!!!! You actually are going to read more of my crappy poetry? Who knew? I know what you're thinking? When will he churn out more bizarre animal life or political rants? MAYBE NEVER!!!!!! Suck on my old poetry, dirtbag!!!!!!!!! The spheres careening through the glories of open space, Vast unseen forces in motion, pushing. Starry twinkles seen distantly 'tween smoky mists, A lone, scarred, wan moon, spinning past all, Great black holes, all consuming, Eight ball, corner pock...

I've got nothing. It's late, I'm tired, and I want points. So I'm taking a page from other bloggers' books, and posting some old high school/ college poetry. You know what I've deteriorated to with my limericks and haikus. Now you can see where it all started....... Celebration I celebrate the dawn, With all the world in silver gray, Laid as if in feast, the sky, In gold and amber, holds the fruits of morning, Gilded pears and strawberries, sweet as a lover's kiss, Rose red apples,...

Simple rules, like the title says, short and sweet, who would you vote for right now? Bush and Cheney? Kerry and Edwards? Nader? Josef Stalin and David Duke? One of the other candidates? (I think it's about seven total.) Write-ins are accepted, but please, no insane political rants(on either side), just want to find out where all you would stand, if you voted today. The JoeUser polls are open for business........... P.S. Mine's Bush/Cheney, but I'd vote for McCain if he were running. ...

As promised, nothing special. This is my fiftieth article, and rather than some zany post, political rant, or discussion of one of my obsessions, (running for example,) just a quick update of my family and my life, semi-newsletterish. Crazy huh? Almost like an online biographical log or something........plus I'm tired of seeing my last rant at the top of the page. First of all, I rented out my house in San Angelo, Tx. It was bought at a time when I was supposed to be getting out a month ag...

ARRRRRGGGHHH!!!! at the end of the debate kerry calls the soldiers in Iraq "the kids"?????????? He says the kids in their HMWVS are suffering????? The kids this? The kids that? Didn't he read my article??? Link And when is he going to stop saying he has a plan and tell us what it is damn it!!! I, and the soldiers I work with are not Kerry's damned kids. Boo on Kerry.

I don't know what else to say, so..... Link

I don't know what else to say, so..... Link

Couldn't run today, Biked two hours in the rain and, Armadillo bits.

Couldn't run today, Biked two hours in the rain and, Armadillo bits.

Enter my rant. This is not a nice article. This is not a funny, cute article about zombie deer, or squirrels with enormous nuts. This is an down and out, set your flamethrower to kill, kiss my ass 'til my hat falls off rant. Be warned. I am weary, weary of soldiers being portrayed in the media as the poor pathetic victims of an oppresive, money grubbing, oil loving government, headed by a pyschopathic commander in chief, hell bent on a religious war of destruction. I am also sick to dea...

This is a post that many won't understand, it is different, but it is something near and dear to my heart. This is possibly one of the single most important parts of army life outside of pointing guns at people and that whole minor protecting the freedom of the nation thing. It's about my boots. Boots are contraversial in the army. Basic issue? Jump boots? Tanker boots? Corframs? Desert? Cold weather, intermediate cold weather? Deserts? Jungle boots? If jungle boots, green or black? I say ...

This is a post that many won't understand, it is different, but it is something near and dear to my heart. This is possibly one of the single most important parts of army life outside of pointing guns at people and that whole minor protecting the freedom of the nation thing. It's about my boots. Boots are contraversial in the army. Basic issue? Jump boots? Tanker boots? Corframs? Desert? Cold weather, intermediate cold weather? Deserts? Jungle boots? If jungle boots, green or black? I say ...

I've finally had enough. I'm breaking one of my cardinal rules for the army, and for the second time in over 5 years, I'm going to sick call tommorow. I toughed it out for 3 days now, but I'm thinking maybe plantar fascitis, maybe stress fracture. I'm thinking about fetching a hacksaw every time I wear my combat boots for more than a couple of hours. This unit is pretty good about getting sick or injured, so I don't have to face the usual stigma against getting sick in the army. Most place...

I've finally had enough. I'm breaking one of my cardinal rules for the army, and for the second time in over 5 years, I'm going to sick call tommorow. I toughed it out for 3 days now, but I'm thinking maybe plantar fascitis, maybe stress fracture. I'm thinking about fetching a hacksaw every time I wear my combat boots for more than a couple of hours. This unit is pretty good about getting sick or injured, so I don't have to face the usual stigma against getting sick in the army. Most place...