Benny Goodman, eat your heart out.
I found my clarinet. I walked into a pawn shop yesterday and there it was. It glowed with a light from heaven and called my name.
Wow. Not bad for seventy-five dollars. It's an old Carl Fischer (am I spelling that right?) wooden B-flat. Very nice. The cork's actually in great shape and the pads? Meh.........they could stand to be redone. Plus a couple of the springs need a little adjusting. It cleaned up and polished beautifully though. It also has a nice tone when not acted upon by user error.
I played a little, earlier. However I was forced to stop, due to a invasion of horny, and slightly confused geese. I'm sure it had nothing to do with my playing though. Still have to relearn some of the fingerings. It's been seven or eight years, and I didn't play that much, then.
Oh yes, the case actually appears to have gone through hell. There are no actual scorch marks, but if you sniff the wood, which is visible, you can smell a faint whiff of brimstone. It's as beat up as any I've ever seen that was still functional. It will be retiring soon to a well deserved grave.
And that's all the news that is news across the nation today. Tune in next time when you'll hear my wife say, "Holy s--t, please please please stop making that racket before I throttle you to death, then insert that thing into the orifice of your choice." Thank you and goodnight.