I go to work in the morning so I don't go to jail.......

107 and counting.....

Published on May 4, 2005 By Spc Nobody Special In Humor

So, what gets you up out of bed in the morning? Love your job? Gotta make the rent? Just wanna get away from the house for a few hours? For me, it's the exhilirating knowledge that if I fail to go to work today, I can lose a months pay, and spend a couple of months in trouble.....if I'm lucky.

On the other hand, being a super secret squirrel MI geek and whatnot (shhh....don't tell anyone), AWOL can lead straight to jail. Wheeee!!!!!! And that's the bright and shining truth that gets me to P.T. of a morning. What happens if you miss work? Dear Lord, I only wish I could get myself fired.

Now don't get me wrong, I did foolishly sign 5 (apparently up to 8, but gonna get away with 6. (fingers crossed, IRR stay away)) of the best years of my life away. And I'll do the job fine. But I'm gonna bitch my head off occasionally. Especially since it's officially against the rules at work. For penalties, see the above and cut the severity in half (not that that ever stops us......)

Received a speech Monday, partly about the importance of our loyalty to the Army and to the unit..............right. They're also apparently concerned about reenlistment. Seems only 5% of our unit plans to stay in, and they suspect there may be a morale problem. I simply can't imagine what they mean.

I'm also supposed to refigure my promotion points, and take language and pt tests. 3 months 'til I'm out, but what the hey. Hmmm.......I wonder why I haven't made sgt. in almost 6 years time, could it be I've been holding out points???!!!!! It's almost like I don't want to be promoted, yet don't want to go through all the shit you take for not jumping through the hoops......sigh. Mostly I don't have any ambition or talent for that job, and I think the Army's got enough piss poor leaders without adding one more.

Please don't talk to me about morale, and loyalty, and what a wonderful thing we're doing for my country. I feel some of that, some feelings of pride and patriotism, some of the time. But really, if I'd never joined, it probably wouldn't have made an ounce of difference or saved a single life. But that's o.k. I'll still get a medal and a plaque when I leave. Whoopee.

This article started going somewhere, but kind of fizzled into an angry and depressed rant. Mostly I don't want the Army's altruisms, or give a damn about what we do, outside of doing my job well. I just want to finish what I'm doing, do it well, and get out. And really, I don't even want that anymore. I just don't want to go to jail for not showing up.

Depressed, angry, and probably going to regret writing this later,
Spc. Nbs............I'm goin' to bed.

Comments

Talisein

on May 04, 2005

Word.

Sugar High Elf

on May 04, 2005

Jail is bad. Not that I've been, but I've seen the movies. Sounds like you need a "Get out of the Army free" card.

Secret Squirrel

on May 05, 2005

You need a Juicie Girl.
A different one for every night of the week.

ParaTed2k

on May 05, 2005

"A Complaining Soldier's a Happy Soldier!" ;~D

Wish I could take those last 107 days and do if for you. Ironic isn't it, you can't wait to get out, and I was "retired" kicking and screaming. Oh well, even if I wasn't, this month I would have gotten my 20 year letter.

Funny how things work, ain't it. Rant away Brother, You've earned it!!

Spc Nobody Special

on May 05, 2005

Like the man turned into a newt, I've got a little better today............106. Did I mention I work in a completely fenced in yard, with barbed wire, armed guards, and my workplace is a small, overcrowded dark windowless hole? Maybe jail wouldn't be that big a change.

Word.

Danke veruh much. Even your presence here is a surprise and an honor. P.S. I liked your exception to policy letter........

You need a Juicie Girl.A different one for every night of the week.

Not bad, but my wife would get jealous. Maybe I could get her to dress up and pret.........hmmmmmmm

Wish I could take those last 107 days and do if for you.

You're welcome to try. I don't think they'll notice the appearance. Just practice NOT speaking Korean all day.

Shovelheat

on May 05, 2005

Huh, I've gone to jail every morning for the past eleven years...

Nebraskawoman

on May 05, 2005

I've only been going to jail for the last 3 months. {I'm still a rookie technically speaking.} I have to tip my hat to you shovel. That's a heck of a long time in our field of work. What position are you? Sarg or Lt?
Oh, and good luck to you SPC. Hope you survive those last 107 days.

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