Maybe this should be under pets instead of humor.........
Published on April 5, 2005 By Spc Nobody Special In Humor
I was just reading a funny story by our very own hunter of lobster,Link when I was reminded of my first apartment after I got married in college, almost nine years ago......

This was a 200 dollar a month wonder in Arkadelphia, Arkansas. While that's not as bad as it sounds (you could get a fairly nice apartment there at the time for 300/350,) this was not prime real estate. It wasn't in the slums or anything, (this town couldn't have supported a slum) but it was the best we could afford for a few months, and it did have it's disadvantages.......

It looked to have been built in the 20's or 30's, and must have been very nice at the time, hardwood floors, nice stairwells, and you couldn't have asked for nicer neighbors in 5 out of the 7 other apartments. Our apartment had previously been rented to pot dealers, but after a couple of explanations to some tense young men, it became well known that they did not live there anymore.

There was the supe, who was finally fired after he was arrested one drunken night after waving his gun around and pointing it at the cops (he didn't shoot anything, I think he was just drunk and forgot to put it back down), the wife beater downstairs (we helped her move back to her family, far far away......), and the crazy lady in one of the downstairs apartments(she screamed at her kid whenever she was home, and spread flour on the floor around her door inside and out so she would know if anyone went in, not that it made a difference, she was totally mental). Sound like a dream home?

Like I said, it all got straightened out and quieted down.......except for the roaches. Big scary ones, with pointy fangs. They were reduced by extreme cleaning, and by repairing holes in the wall left by the pot heads (where do ya think I learned drywall?), but you could never get them all. The Orkin lady was too scared of roaches to even go in the attic, she'd just toss bombs up there every week or two. Big. Pointy fangs. The best rule was use the buddy system whenever you went in the apartment, and take a weapon........

My favorite though, was the two and a half inch bull roach that got in my VCR and died. Right in front of the display, and you couldn't shake it loose. This was, (I know, hard to believe), before the DVD revolution, and VCR's were still expensive, we were still broke. So every time you wanted to watch a movie, you had to avoid looking at the brilliantly lit-up-in-yellow undercarriage of this male cockroach. We moved out after a few months. We killed the bugs that followed us. But this little booger followed us around for almost three years. Strange what you can live with when you get used to it, huh?

It was a long time ago, almost nine years since it happened, but I sometimes almost miss that guy............almost.

Comments
on Apr 05, 2005
I. Hate. Roaches.

I lived in Florida for a few years. We'd get the palmetto bugs. Roaches with wings. Nasty!

Hawaii was nice, though. Let a few geckos into the house and you have good luck and roach hunters all rolled into one!
on Apr 05, 2005
Hold the phone... did you say Arkadelphia, AR? I'm about to start singing It's a Small World. Arkadelphia is my hometown. I've gone to school there since kindergarten, and went to head start at HSU when I was three and four. This is just strange!
on Apr 05, 2005
Let a few geckos into the house and you have good luck and roach hunters all rolled into one!


S' what I've got cats for........but it IS fun to watch the cats chase the geckos around too.........(even though it's really gross when they break their tail off to escape, and it wiggles in Euripide's throat making him spew........)

So is the supply office open today? Or another round of funeral detail? I'm still home on conval. leave with pneumonia, (last day)although I'm probably about to make a quick trip to the store. I'll check in later.
on Apr 05, 2005
Hold the phone... did you say Arkadelphia, AR?


Yeppers. I went to college at Ouachita. In fact, I'm pretty sure I've met Myrrander, and if you know the Taggard family, I'm sorta related by marraige now......and I know Mark Simmons, (and his brother) who opened up that coffee house downtown.

The apt. was in that red brick building behind the post office (it doesn't look nearly so bad on the outside since that tornado 'bout seven years ago....
on Apr 05, 2005
So is the supply office open today? Or another round of funeral detail?


I actually have a funeral this afternoon. Will probably write about it first thing tomorrow morning. Already have a bit to say about the preparations, so it will be a long one.
on Apr 05, 2005
Oh yeah... I remember Justin. That's funny. And I remember the tornado... March 1, 1997. Too bad you were on the other side of the ravine...
on Apr 05, 2005
I remember Justin.


Ackk......my wife's cousin (and good friend) married his brother Neil. We'd just moved near the hospital actually, which is a good thing, since the tornado put a large piece of pine tree through our old bedroom window.

However, I was pulling in behind the school trying to get away from the one that hit Gurdon and wasn't supposed to arrive for a half hour, when this one crossed the river maybe 300 yards away. It threw a 30 some odd chunk of roof right over my head and into the ravine, and started raining debris.

That's when I yanked the parking brake on my car and ran like hell for a solid building. Who knows, maybe the tornado ate the roaches...........
on Apr 05, 2005
Shameless points-whoring forum bump. Please share, I liked the earlier bit, but I want to know if anything like this has happened to you. Failing that, I'd love to hear about your tornadoes.........