inquiring minds want to know.....
Published on March 31, 2005 By Spc Nobody Special In Humor
Morning y'all. Doing much better, as long as I move s.....l....o.....w......ly.

There's an unexpected side effect to my pneumonia though. Ever know someone to go in the hospital with a ruptured appendix, or some virus, and come out 30, 40 lbs lighter? I know it's not healthy, but you get that sort of Betty Grable in Dark Horse (she dies of brain cancer) waifish sort of look, you know?

I figured that that would be one of the few good effects to come from this, but oh, the shock to my vanity, I gained. I mean I GAINED.
One week down, and with water retention I'm up 14 pounds, and an 1" 3/4 around the waist. So call me MISTER puffy face. Jiggle jiggle jiggle.....tee hee........

So......what I'm thinking is, can fat be caught in a viral form? Is this a horrible government conspiracy? Am I victim to a militarily engineered nanotechnology designed to be used on Kim Jong Il? (if so, it worked on him great.........) Is there a hotline? 1-800-FAT-SICK........

The doc said it'll go away, but in the meantime, like mammy Yokum said to Dwight........your jeans are too tight. If this has happened to you, don't wait. Post a comment Now!!!!!"

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