The Grudge, a Limerick Review

More scares than a Bea Arthur porn flick............

Published on October 23, 2004 By Spc Nobody Special In Humor

A horror all shock and suspense?
No girls with big boobs or violence?
Yet so scary it seems,
That I soon left the scene,
To the bathrooms, my pants for to rinse.

The opening was scary and quick,
Killer ghost hiding in the attic,
We all jumped and we screamed,
(It was better than The Ring),
And my balls tried to hide 'neath my dick.

So if you like movies with frights,
Take your girl, gotta see it tonight,
She's sure to latch on ya,
Tight as pants on Maddona,
Until all her knuckles turn white.

Seriously, this is way better than their last film, the ring, and that was pretty good. This scared the crap out of me in places, and I'm a horror nut that only Night of the Living Dead (the original one) ever gave nightmares to. (when I was 10)

Comments

Texas Wahine

on Oct 23, 2004

I can't watch the commercials because they scare me so much . . . I'll have to wait until Adrian's home and it's out on video to see this one. We had noticed in the commercials that it's only PG-13, and decided that must mean it's good enough to not need the aid of superfluous boobies . . . guess we were right.

Great limerick . . . love this stuff!

PS - Why do you think it is that it's getting bad reviews?

Spc Nobody Special

on Oct 23, 2004

Why do you think it is that it's getting bad reviews?

Maybe it's because the critics are mad at the directors for making them put stains in their pants at the previews........

Spc Nobody Special

on Oct 23, 2004

We had noticed in the commercials that it's only PG-13,

I DEFINITELY wouldn't take the kids to this one though. I'd sooner take them to see natural born killers or a clockwork orange. Not much violence, just you don't want them screaming you awake every night for a month.

Although there was a kid about 9 or ten in the row in front of me with his mom, and I heard somebody's two/three year old crying. What kind of parent makes a little kid sit through something like that? The scares in this were scary without real violence, in the same way that Team America's puppet sex was beyond blatant without the puppets ever actually being anatomically correct.

Texas Wahine

on Oct 23, 2004

Although there was a kid about 9 or ten in the row in front of me with his mom, and I heard somebody's two/three year old crying. What kind of parent makes a little kid sit through something like that?

I do not get that. When we went to see The Blair Witch Project (full of cursing and scary stuff), there were little kids playing in the aisles. When we went to see Gladiator, there were toddlers asking mommy for a drink of soda. When we went to see 28 Days Later, there were seven year olds picking on each other in the back. I don't understand how any parent can think that is OK! Movie theaters shouldn't even allow it. It's child abuse. Why, why, why does someone do that? When we don't have childcare and we want to see a movie, we wait for it come out on video. We're grown-ups, and we can wait a few months . . . we are not so silly and impulsive that we can't live another day without seeing a movie that looks good to us but will likely psychologically traumatize our children forever . . . grrrr . . .

dharmagrl

on Oct 23, 2004

And my balls tried to hide 'neath my dick.

Coke on the monitor.....hahahahah!

I want to see this flick...now that Shea is old enough to babysit her brothers, I think that D and I might go to see it.

Although there was a kid about 9 or ten in the row in front of me with his mom, and I heard somebody's two/three year old crying.

It never deases to amaze me that people are stupid enough to take their kids to scary movies and then wonder why they get upset and cry. Idiots.

Texas Wahine

on Oct 23, 2004

BTW . . . our 6 year old neighbor keeps telling my son that he needs to watch 13 Ghosts and has been begging me to let my son watch it at his house. WTF?

LeapingLizard

on Oct 23, 2004

Haha...! Love the verse, creative commentary is always refreshing. I can't wait to see the movie. I just saw Ring 0, creepy and worth it.

Ravenblack

on Oct 23, 2004

In the original Japanese version, IIRC the Grudge is part of a trilogy - there is Prelude and Grudge 2.

LeapingLizard

on Oct 23, 2004

Ravenback (or anyone),
Is the movie just called Prelude? Do you know anything about Ju-On: The Curse, or something like that?

Ravenblack

on Oct 23, 2004

No, I think it has a different title, I'm not sure what it is, might be The Curse. There's at least three in the Ju'On series. Only Ju'On: The Grudge was released to the threatres, the other two were released on video only. I don't know much about the films themselves because I never dared to watch them. Not yet at least.

Background on movies link.

Spc Nobody Special

on Oct 23, 2004

BTW . . . our 6 year old neighbor keeps telling my son that he needs to watch 13 Ghosts and has been begging me to let my son watch it at his house. WTF?

Tell him he can start with Casper and work his way up, one ghost a year.

Nadeon

on Oct 25, 2004

"Seriously, this is way better than their last film, the ring, and that was pretty good. This scared the crap out of me in places, and I'm a horror nut that only Night of the Living Dead (the original one) ever gave nightmares to. (when I was 10)"

I havn't seen it yet but it sounds good. My nightmare was the original 13 Ghosts and the scene where the canopy bed smothers folks. I had a bedroom with eaves...I didn't sleep for a month!

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